Postmortem: Covert Affairs 2×08

5 Sep

I’m sorry for the delay in writing about last week’s Covert Affairs, but honestly, it was so disappointing I just couldn’t muster up the energy to write about it until now.  Not disappointing in the psychic sense, mind you—I guessed pretty much everything correctly.  But after last week’s epic Auggie episode, I was decidedly underwhelmed with the angst of Annie and her crazy-eyed former fling.  They knew each other for THREE WEEKS.  It was TWO YEARS AGO.  In SRI LANKA.  He has CRAZY EYES.  Why does she still care about him?  Why are we supposed to care about him?  This whole plot is mystifying to me with its stupidness.

In other love interest that I don’t care about news, wtf is up with the sudden appearance of Jai as a romantic interest?  They moved from awkward, painful flirting to meeting the family awfully quickly.  I know why they did it—they needed a successful date to juxtapose with Ben’s arrival, plus Jai needed to know where Annie lives—but there needs to be more reason to put two characters together than just it being necessary for plot purposes.  At least set it up in earlier episodes.  Especially since last week’s set up the beginnings of an Annie/Auggie relationship.  There has to be SOME rhyme or reason to character pairings. For fuck’s sake.  I am getting way too angry at a USA program.  I think it’s because neither of the Tuesday shows had a shirtless dude, and that is frankly unacceptable.

But prediction-wise, I did pretty well.  As far as the episode-only twist, I totally knew that the auction guy was gonna turn up to be a baddie.  It is, again, another example of secondary character, introduced once then forgotten.  If someone has dialogue that serves no immediate plot purpose, it’s almost a given that they’re going to be the baddie, especially if it’s an attractive, young-to-middle-aged white person.

As for previous season-long predictions, I see that I was right in saying that the Ben mystery would be resolved fairly quickly.  Yes, there’s still some story there that has to be resolved, but we know that he’s a CIA agent gone rogue, and they totally could have dragged that shit out much longer.  Point for me.

Now for some predictions:

First off, one that I forgot to post last week:  we’re totally going to see Tash again.  Any time a character says something like “I’ll probably never speak to her again”, you can assume they’re actually saying “I’m totally going to speak to her again next season, probably during a sweeps week.”  I’ll be glad, too.  I like her.  She’s like the character that the show thinks Annie is, except Russian.  In Soviet Russia, show watches you, and is awesome, apparently.

Also, Auggie’s op on Liza Hearn will come to light within the next two episodes.  He’ll get in trouble for it, but there’ll be no lasting effect.

I’m pushing back my prediction that the season finale will involve Danielle or her family being kidnapped or something until next season, or even season three:  there’s too much plot to wrap up as it is without adding that.  Instead, I predict that the finale will involve Annie having to choose between Crazy-Eyed Ben and the CIA.  Since the show’s been picked up for next season, she’ll pick the CIA.

Finally, my crackpot theory of the week:  the Ben plot will resolve with him and Arthur having a dance-off to see who’s the best goddamn dancer in the CIA.  Please tell me that I’m not the only one hoping for a Center Stage reunion.

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